Notes From an Alzheimer's Caregiver

My New Alzheimer's Blog

2011-02-26T10:58:00.000-08:00

I'm writing a new blog about Alzheimer's, Alzheimer's News & Notes , at the Advice and Info network. I shall discuss this malady, as well as caregiving, and answer questions from readers. I hope you'll find it helpful.

Do stop by Alzheimer's News &Notes and give your input.

Riding Through Autumn with Mother

2010-10-17T19:41:00.000-07:00

One of my fondest autumn memories with Mother involved a ride over the back roads of Quaker Hill, NY, as we viewed the colorful leaves. My husband and I made weekly trips from NH to NYS (a 275 mile journey) to care for Mother and her affairs.

When we arrived at her home this autumn afternoon, Mother, in the mid stages of Alzheimer's, suggested going for a ride. We had just driven 6 hours, but there was still plenty of daylight and the leaves were so colorful. Also, Quaker Hill figured into my dad's family history, so I thought it would be a good time to explore this area, too.

Mother "oohed" and "aahed" the whole trip as she admired the brilliant red, yellow, orange and bronze leaves midst the evergreens. Sometimes it was a single tree along the road. Other times the view consisted of a panorama spread out before us. She talked about this ride for days afterward, even though there were other memories she couldn't pull together.

So...when I see the fabulous colors of autumn, I recall the pleasure this outing gave Mother and added a bright spot in her Alzheimer's world.

Newsletter & Quote from Richard Taylor, PhD

2010-10-14T14:36:00.000-07:00

Richard Taylor has published another of his monthly newsletters, giving us insight into the life of someone diagnosed with Alzheimer's. He travels and speaks around the country.

I found so poignant, this quote from Richard's newsletter: Please, just be, that is what we are trying to do, that is what we sometimes need your help to enable us to fully be who we are at the moment.

This is what I learned as a caregiver for my mom and aunt, even though they couldn't verbalize specifically what they wanted me to be. I learned "to live in this moment in time," with Mother and Auntie and enjoy that moment...to be whomever they wanted me to be and to visit them wherever they might think they were. I learned it could be an adventure, not one we may have wished, but one we were experiencing.

Wandering Minds and Feet of the Alzheimer's Patient

2010-09-28T07:01:00.000-07:00

Wandering becomes a critical part of Alzheimer's and something families find difficult to cope with.

The Alzheimer's victim's mind wanders off the topic at hand and reverts to the past or something they see or someone in the room does. This isn't necessarily dangerous, simply very frustrating.

However, wandering feet can endanger the Alzheimer's patient. They apparently have in their mind a destination but it isn't a practical one. They may leave the house (or wherever they are) in all kinds of weather and in inappropriate dress. You may find them (hopefully you or someone you know does) on a city street, in your neighborhood, in the woods, along a country road or on a busy highway.

Keeping Alzheimer's patients where you know their whereabouts becomes a serious challenge at some point in their care.

Mark Warner has some good ideas on this topic to help the caregiver, as well as the wanderer, in In Search of the Alzheimer's Wanderer: A Workbook to Protect You.

I was involved in the care of both my mom and my aunt (Mother's sister) who developed Alzheimer's and who reached the wandering stage. They would try to (and occasionally did) leave the house in all kinds of weather when they made up their minds about reaching a particular destination. They could not understand why you wouldn't let them.

Friends Sharing About Alzheimer's

2010-09-22T08:53:00.000-07:00

Yesterday a friend asked me how I coped with caring for my mom who had Alzheimer's. Her mom now is living in a nursing home and seeming to be battling the same disease.

You cope by taking one day at a time with that person.
You cope by learning all you can about the disease to better understand.
You cope by planning ahead...yes, you must consider that they won't get better, but will fall further into their Alzheimer's world.
You give them pleasure by being whomever they wish for the day.
You look at this as an adventure.

You find someone who has been there, with whom you can talk and share.

Alzheimer's Resource - Minding Our Elders

2010-09-06T11:24:00.000-07:00

A very good resource for Alzheimer's caregivers, to enable them to understand their family member or patient, is Carol Bradley Bursack's web site, Minding Our Elders. As Carol describes it...Breaking the Isolation: Information and Support for Caregivers and Seniors.

Carol discusses many topics on a daily basis and offers many resources.

She also is the author of the book Minding Our Elders: Caregivers Share Their Personal Stories.

Do you have a favoriet Alzheimer's resource that has helped you cope and to understand this disease?

Children's Approach to Alzheimer's

2010-08-25T12:15:00.000-07:00

"I make Grandma happy," my granddaughter remarked (7-years old at the time), when someone asked why she visited when her great grandmother (my mother) didn't know her and couldn't talk well.

Kara's response made me realize I hadn't made a mistake to take Kara and her young brother on my visits to see Mother in the nursing home. They were learning about growing older, forgetfulness, illness and being family. Caring for one another would become part of their lives.

The youngsters enjoyed their visits. We had various rituals that Mother enjoyed. We shared meals or afternoon tea with her. Kara and Alex joined in activities with the other residents. (Mother's Alzheimer's was too advanced for her to do this now.) They drew pictures for her and made cards. We sang songs.

If you treat the visits as an ordinary part of life, youngsters generally won't be afraid to visit relatives in nursing and assisted living homes. They'll show fear and reluctance mainly if the adults do.

These may be Kara and Alex's only memories of my mother, but they'll have fond memories rather than scary or distasteful ones, just as I do.

(Image: sxc.hu)

Finding the Joy in Alzheimer's
Finding the Joy in Alzheimer's (Book II)
(I have essays in both of these books.)

Discover Glass Full of Tears

2010-08-18T09:10:00.000-07:00

One of the very interesting and informative books for caregivers, written from a wife's viewpoint, is Glass Full of Tears, Dementia Day-By-Day by June Lund Shiplett. Here June relates the frustrations and joys of caring for her husband as he developed dementia.

Whether your family member has Alzheimer's or some other form of dementia, June's account may help you get through each day. You'll realize you aren't alone.

I met June when we taught at a writers' workshop and then attended a book signing for our books. Coincidentally, I was caring for my mom, who had Alzheimer's, at the time June was promoting her book and speaking to groups.

Sharing Comfort Among Alzheimer's Caregivers

2010-08-17T08:49:00.000-07:00

"Mary, I'm so glad we talked," Kay said. "Now I know I'm not the only one experiencing these problems with Mom."

Even though my mom and aunt, both of whom had Alzheimer's, have passed away, I still find that sharing my experiences involving them helps to comfort others and enables others to understand the person they're caring for. Kay has been caring for her 94 year-old mother, who now is in a nursing home, but seems to have developed Alzheimer's or some form of dementia. Mom gets mixed up about who people are, suspects those around her of plotting against her, and in general becoming a different person from the one they've known all their lives.

Kay's talk with me seemed to reassure her that what she and her mom were experiencing was "normal" in the circumstances.

So many people don't want to talk about their experiences while caring for a loved one with Alzheimer's. They want to put it all behind them once that person is gone. However, if you can find the incentive to share, you just might be helping others.

Something to think about!

(In the above book, Finding the Joy in Alzheimer's, I share some of my experiences with Mother. Other caregivers have much to share, too.)

Another Alzheimer's Resource

2009-12-06T18:09:00.000-08:00

Alzheimer's Weekly & Dementia Weekly Newsletter is delivered to you via e-mail from the Alzheimer's Weekly web site.
Here you'll find many updates about these conditions delivered in a very readable and attractive format.

Dr. Richard Taylor's Newsletter

2009-10-30T19:16:00.000-07:00

To understand dementia and Alzheimers From the Inside Out, you'll want to subscribe to Dr. Richard Taylor's e-mail newsletter. (It's available online and by e-mail.)

Richard Taylor speaks and travels to encourage others and bring insight into his world. He's an author and also has a web site.

What Would You Like to Know?

2009-10-29T04:59:00.000-07:00

As I get back to writing here about Alzheimer's and caregiving, I'm wondering what my readers would like to know. How can I help you as you deal with Alzheimer's in a loved one? I can't make the situation go away, but perhaps I can help you understand and to encourage you as you go through each day.

Perhaps I can be someone you can share your frustrations with and help you realize you can survive.

Getting Back to Writing about Alzheimer's

2009-08-22T19:43:00.000-07:00

Just noticed I have some followers to my blog, so I'd better get posting again! I've been busy with other blogs, one on Parenting at Blisstree, which does contain some Alzheimer's posts.

However, I'll share some more words of encouragement here at Notes from an Alzheimer's Caregiver.

Although I no longer actively care for a family member (both Mother and Auntie have passed away), I do have memories of the trials and joys and hope I can encourage others by sharing.

I also give talks on Alzheimer's and caregiving and provide information about scrapbooking and journaling activities with those experiencing memory loss.

(Image from sxc.hu)

Obama's Proposed Health Care - Euthanasia for the Elderly & Infirm?

2009-03-10T09:08:00.000-07:00

In all the excitement over health care for all, as proposed by Barack Obama and his team of White House administrators and Congressional colleagues, will people look carefully at what it contains? Or will they blindly accept what seems like a good deal without scrutinizing the details, like refusal of treatment for the elderly and those deemed uncurable (by administrators, not doctors and medical staff)?

Check out the article at Alzheimer's Notes, Obama's New Health Care - Will It Result in Elder Neglect & Euthanasia?

March Blizzard Memories of Alzheimer's Patients

2009-03-09T08:25:00.000-07:00

Does your Alzheimer's patient have memories of blizzards and snowstorms, either in their childhood or yours? My grandfather often told us about his experiences in the March 11th Blizzard of 1888 in New York State, when he worked on a farm. Those have become ingrained memories for me, even though I wasn't around in those days. My mom often related the stories Grandpa told of those days. Even in her Alzheimer's years, a big snow storm would set her to reminiscing.

For some reading about the catastrophic Blizzards of 1888, first in the West and then on the east coast:

City of Snow: The Great Blizzard of 1888 by Linda Oatman High.
In All Its Fury: A History of the Blizzard of January 12, 1888 by W. H. O'Gara.
Blizzard! The 1888 Whiteout by Jacqueline A. Ball.
Blizzard!: The Storm That Changed America by Jim Murphy

More recent blizzards & storms:
One to Remember: The Relentless Blizzard of March 1966 by Douglas Ramsey
Northeast Snowstorms by Louis W. Uccellini

Fiction:
Lost in the Blinded Blizzard (Hank the Cowdog) by John R. Erickson

Books About Daylight Saving Time & Spring

2009-03-08T14:22:00.000-07:00

Discover facts and figures (the curious and the ordinary) about Spring and Daylight Saving Time

Seize the Daylight: The Curious and Contentious Story of Daylight Saving Time by David Prerau
Spring Forward: The Annual Madness of Daylight Saving Time by Michael Downing
Crafting Springtime Gifts: 25 Adorable Projects Featuring Bunnies, Chicks, Lambs & Other Springtime Favorites by Tone Finnanger
Time for Change: Setting Clocks Forward by One Hour Thorughout the Year by Mayer Hillman
The Divine Hours: Prayers for Springtime by Phyllis Tickle

Pictures Prompt Memories for Alzheimer's Patients

2009-02-28T17:36:00.000-08:00

I've discussed, over at my Alzheimer's Notes blog, Capture Memories of Alzheimer's Patient's Earlier Days & Travels, by referring to photos. I recalled, as I was looking at a family photo of us at the Nubble Light in Cape Neddick, Maine, childhood vacation memories and marveled at my father and mother's patience when traveling with four children in a small car.

Check out the post and see what ideas and memories photos will spark for you and your Alzheimer's patient.

Learning About Alzheimer's from Richard Taylor, Ph.D

2009-02-26T07:12:00.000-08:00

Learning first hand what it's like to experience dementia or Alzheimer's unables us caregivers and family members to be more understanding and helpful. I often tried to realize where Mother and Auntie were coming from, what world they were living in on a particular day, what was motivating their behavior and thought processes. Putting myself into their world (at least the best I could) enabled me to be more understanding and patient...and even enjoy my foray into a time past. Hopefully this made an increasingly difficult life easier for them, too.

Richard Taylor has been diagnosed with dememtia, probably of the Alzheimer's type. His purpose now is writing and speaking to inform, help and encourage others, both victims and caregivers, as well as the general public.

Richard maintains a web site complete with videos, provides a monthly newsletter, and has written the book, Alzheimer's from the Inside Out.

I wish I'd had something like Richard's web site, blog, newsletters and videos to help me when Mother and Auntie were ill.
(Amazon image)

Alzheimer's Caregiver Blogger Published in Anthology

2009-02-24T11:45:00.000-08:00

Alzheimer's Caregiver blogger, Mary Emma Allen has stories featured in the new release, Eternally Yours, an anthology of poetry, light essays, devotions and meditations, edited by Mary Ellen Grisham and published by Xulon Press.

Featuring some of the best Christian writers on the Internet, this book represents work that has appeared in the Eternal Ink E-zine since it’s inception in 1999.

In addition, Mary gives presentations and teaches workshops at schools, libraries, writers’ conferences, and for other groups. Some of her talks include topics such as Alzheimer's and caregiving, quilt history and quiltmaking, New Hampshire history, and writing.

I was pleased when Ms. Grisham selected some of my stories for inclusion in this anthology. It's exciting to encourage and inspire others with my writing.

Winter Reading on a Snowy Day in Alzheimer's World

2009-02-23T09:10:00.000-08:00

We're digging out from a blizzard that left 12-16 inches of snow, depending on whether it drifted or not. Along with show shoveling tasks, reading is on the agenda today because the grandchildren are home on winter break.

We are a family of readers in our multi-generational home (grandfather, granny, mom, dad and the two children). Books abound around the house, the library is a fun place to visit, bookstores (new and used) hold a fascination, and online bookstores are enjoyable to access. We also come from ancestors who were readers and writers, too.

Reading in an Alzheimer's World

My mother enjoyed reading, too. She could sit midst clutter in her kitchen and read. When any of us remarked that there were dishes to be washed, a floor to sweep, windows to clean, etc., Mother replied, "The chores will always be there. But I might not always be able to read."

How true this turned out to be! When Mother developed Alzheimer's, she followed words with her finger in a magazine and repeated them aloud. Eventually, she could no longer do that, so a staff member or I read to her. Then she looked at magazine pictures, after she couldn't understand words. These often brought memories they brought to mind.

Reading brought Mother pleasure and learning for many years. I even have a read book she used in school in the early 1900s. It was one of the last activities she gave up during her Alzheimer's years.

What are you and your Alzheimer's patient reading this winter?

Obama's Stimulus Bill's Affect on Health Care Free Choice Discussed at Alzheimer's Notes

2009-02-11T10:19:00.000-08:00

Concern for the effect of the health care proposals in the Stimulus Bill on Alzheimer's patients is discussed at Alzheimer's Notes under, Stimulus Health Care Provisions Could Eliminate the Elderly, the Infirm and Terminally Ill.

This information somehow was buried in the multiple pages of the bill and didn't come to light with wider publicity until a couple days ago. Only now are the ramifications of this provision being realized.

Related Posts:
“Big Brother” health care provisions
Fast Tracking Govt. Control of Health Care
Eliminate the Elderly
Motto of the Stimulus Bill

Valentine's Day in Alzheimer's World

2009-02-06T20:18:00.001-08:00

Do you and your family participate in Valentine's Day festivities? Does your Alzheimer's patient join in? Does this bring back memories for them?

This was a fun family day when I was a youngster because Mother made it so. She had been a school teacher and held parties for her students. Thus, she incorporated some of these ideas into festivities for my sister, two brothers and me, even though she was a busy farm wife.

*Mother often decorated a cake with white frosting and red hearts. When we were old enough, sister and I did this for her.
*She helped us with making and addressing valentines for family members. When we were in school we had exchanges there, too.
*Mother planned a special night meal for Valentine's Day, with the cake and fruit for dessert. There was only our family...four children, Mother, Father and the hired man...but we had a joyous time.
*We made decorations to hang around the kitchen (the warmest room in our farmhouse during winter), and name cards for each place setting.

Suggestions:
The Night Before Valentine's Day (picture book)
Where Is Baby's Valentine (lift-a-flap book)
My Fuzzy Valentine (Sesame Street Board Book)
Be My Valentine, Charlie Brown (DVD)
Disney Valentine Assortment

What do you and your family do for Valentine's Day at your house?

Check Out the Giveaway at Quilting and Patchwork

2008-12-21T12:57:00.000-08:00

Giveaways

If you're a quilter or simply like giveaways, why not stop over at Quilting and Patchwork and participate in the Giveaway of a Mini Quilt Book.? It's in progress over there.

Perhaps you're not a quilter yourself, but know of someone who would enjoy this book by Patricia Mainardi. Maybe your Alzheimer's family member is a quilter and still enjoys reminiscing about the quilts in her life.

My Fav b5 Posts of the Week

2008-12-19T14:08:00.000-08:00

Favorite Posts

Periodically b5 bloggers post their favorite posts of the week. I write three blogs at b5media, Alzheimer's Notes, Quilting and Patchwork, and One Book Two Book. (The latter I co-blog with Marcie Pickelsimer.)

Sometimes it's difficult to choose your very favorite for the week. However, here are the three for this week:

http://www.quiltingandpatchwork.com/...ilt-mysteries/ http://www.onebooktwobook.com/mary-e...storm-of-2008/http://www.alzheimersnotes.com/not-h...-nursing-home/

Tea Parties for Alzheimer's Patients

2008-12-04T06:10:00.000-08:00

If you are considering tea parties for the Alzheimer's patients or other caregivers in your life...and they can be such fun activities for all of you...you might like to check out these posts at my Alzheimer's Notes blog.

Tea Time at Alzheimer's Notes - Caregivers Sharing
Tea Time at Alzheimer's Notes - Tea Time With Mother

Giveaways Just for Fun...Here Are Some With Gifts for Youngsters

2008-12-04T05:22:00.000-08:00

One Book Two Book Giveaways

Fan of giveaways? You'll find a series of them at a blog I co-author, One Book Two Book, running from Dec. 2-7.

Check out the rules and leave comments at the following links. You can enter any or all of the giveaways. These will make great Christmas gifts for youngsters, too. Enjoy!

Book Swim Giveaway
Readeez DVD Giveaway
Baby Can Read Giveaway
Wii Pop Star Guitar Giveaway
Fly Me To The Moon Giveaway
Giveaway - Celebrity Arthur Book from Speakaboos
Giveaway - Countdown to Bedtime Soundbooks
Giiveaway - ECO Baby Organic Playdough
Baby Potential Teacher Onesie Giveaway
Natural Pod Giveaway
RideMakerz Giveaway
Happy Green Bee Giveaway
Mead Writing Fundamentals Giveaway

Christmas Shopping Suggestions

2008-11-27T12:24:00.001-08:00

Super Shopping

To aid you in preparing for Black Friday and Cyber Monday and your other shopping, I've compiled lists and suggestions at my b5media blogs: One Book Two Book, Quilting and Patchwork, and Alzheimer's Notes.

Alzheimer's Notes:Holiday Shopping for Alzheimer's Caregivers

Quilting & Patchwork:2008 Holiday Gift Guide for Quilters & Fabric Artists

One Book Two Book:2008 Holiday Gift Guide (Mary Emma)

Did you find one list more helpful than another? If so, which one?

ENJOY!

Happy Thanksgiving from Mary Emma

2008-11-27T07:46:00.000-08:00

Happy Thanksgiving

We've been busy this morning getting the turkey ready. Yes, we're having the traditional turkey. My hubby selected it so has been monitoring the preparations. After I made the stuffing ("like Mother used to make!"), I left the rest to him. The engineer in him cooks to precision.

My daughter has been preparing her special recipes to add to our menu. She made her daughter's request of "glop" for breakfast...a combination of bread cubes, eggs, sausage, cheese, and milk. Some of us like that, while others have something else. (We live in a multi-generational home with six family members, a dog, guinea pig, and rabbit.)

Perhaps you'd like to see my Thankful Poem, a project on my Alzheimer's Notes blog.

How about writing your own Thankful Poem this weekend? Or any time of year?

Enjoy the Small Triumphs of Caregiving

2008-11-19T17:29:00.000-08:00

Caregiving Triumphs

As you go through the day to day tasks and frustrations of caregiving for an Alzheimer's patient, you may not think you're experiencing triumphs. However, train yourself to look for these, write them down, and share them.

At my Alzheimer's Notes blog, some of my readers have shared theirs in the post, Enjoying the Small Triumphs of Caring for Alzheimer's Patients.

What have been some of your triumphs?

Finger Foods for Alzheimer's Patients

2008-11-06T12:16:00.000-08:00

Finger Foods

After a certain point, it becomes difficult for Alzheimer's patients to manipulate eating utensils (cutlery). So finger foods become ideal for them. I've had numerous questions about preparing this food and what caregivers can serve for variety.

We have a very good guest post over at Alzheimer's Notes with foods and recipes from a specialist in this area. Venture over for Alzheimer's Finger Foods Suggestions.

Novenber is National Alzheimer's Awareness Month

2008-11-02T19:32:00.000-08:00

Alzheimer's Awareness

This month - November - we raise awareness of Alzheimer's disease and give recognition to all those involved - patients, caregivers, supporters, researchers and everyone who cares.

I shall be writing about this topic here and at Alzheimer's Notes, where I also blog.

What would you like to read about and learn about regarding Alzheimer's?

Can Alzheimer's Caregivers Become Obsessive?

2008-10-25T14:12:00.000-07:00

Caregiving and Obsessiveness

After reading Carol Bradley Bursack's post, Obsessive Caregiving Can Be Harmful to Caregiver and Care Receivers, I realized that some caregivers could find caregiving overwhelming because they became too intense with their task.

So I wrote a post, When Caregiving Becomes an Obsession, at Alzheimer's Notes to call attention to this fact and referred to Carol's post.

You may want check this out and let me know what you think.

Voting By Dementia/Alzheimer's Patients...Should It Be Allowed?

2008-10-22T17:33:00.001-07:00

Voting or Not to Vote?

This question arises as election time approaches and is especially of concern during Presidential Elections.

I've written about this at my Alzheimer's Notes blog at b5media and received some interesting comments. You may want to check my posts out and see what you think of this situation.

Should Dementia/Alzheimer's Patients Vote?

More on Voting and Alzheimer's Patients

What do you think?

Alzheimer's Patients & Voting

2008-10-21T20:22:00.000-07:00

Should Alzheimer's Patients Vote?

This is a question that baffles many people, especially family members of Alzheimer's patients. Check out my discussion on this topic at Alzheimer's Notes, Should Dementia/Alzheimer's Patients Vote?

Since this is a right, do we have a right to take it away from them? If so, when? Who should determine whether there is a time when they really don't know what they're doing?

CHECK OUT THE "ALL ABOUT ALZHEIMER'S CARNIVAL"

2008-01-14T11:53:00.000-08:00

Over at the b5media blog, Alzheimer's Notes, I write with Liz Lewis, the second All About Alzheimer’s Carnivals is open for entries. Here is a platform for you to write your thoughts and feelings about Alzheimer’s and caregiving.

Entering carnivals (those collections of articles about particular topics hosted at one blog) proves to be very enjoyable, I’ve found. If you’ve never entered one, simply follow the directions by clicking on the link above.

You might enjoy reading articles submitted to the First All About Alzheimer's Carnival that appeared in December, 2007, at Alzheimer's Notes.

I’ve also posted some suggestions for carnivals at my b5media Home Biz Notes blog I write with Yvonne Russell. You may like to take a look at these to familiarize yourself:

Tweak Your Topic for Carnivals
Home Biz Owners - Join the Carnival!
Participating in Showcases and Carnivals
Entering Your Home Business Post in a Showcase

You'll find enjoyment in reading the numerous entries at the Second All About Alzheimer's Carnival. So if you don’t enter (and if you do), come over to Liz’s post at Alzheimer's Notes on January 19, when she’ll publish the entries.

(c)2008 Mary Emma Allen

Alzheimer's News at Alzheimer's Notes - Senior Testing

2007-12-31T17:24:00.000-08:00

Yoy might enjoy keeping up to date with what's going on at my Alzheimer's Notes blog at b5media, where I co-blog with Liz Lewis. We balance one another really well and enjoy this joint venture.

A topic gets you thinking is Should All Seniors Be Tested for Alzheimer's? And my personal reflections since I'm a senior, Do I Want to Be Tested for Alzheimer's?

I asked for others to share their thoughts. So I’ll begin:

Do I want to be tested? More specifically, do I want someone to say, “You MUST be tested for Alzheimer’s or your likeliness of acquiring it?”

What do you think? Do you want to be tested? Let us know what you think.

Check Out Alzheimer's Notes for the Latest News

2007-05-22T17:51:00.000-07:00

Since it's difficult to keep two blogs fully updated, I recommend that visitors to this blog check out my Alzheimer's Notes blog at b5media. Liz Lewis and I draw from experience and online and print resources to bring you the latest about Alzheimer's and caregiving.

For instance, we've been discussing whether drinking wine will help slow Alzheimer's. Also, what do you think about placing microchips on Alzheimer's patients to help find them when they wander? I also have a poll at Alzheimer's Notes regarding this latter topic.

See you at Alzheimer's Notes!

My Co-Blogger on Alzheimer's Notes Interviewed

2007-03-19T10:47:00.000-07:00

Liz Lewis, my co-blogger over at b5media's Alzheimer's Notes has been interviewed by Yvonne Russell at Grow Your Writing Business. Yvonne calls her a freelance writing blogstar who has been developing her career very rapidly.

With her experience as an RN working with older adults, Liz complements my experience as a caregiver for my mom and aunt. We also come from opposite sides of the globe so now give Alzheimer's Notes an international dimension.

Co-Author at My Other Alzheimer's Blog

2007-03-15T15:47:00.000-07:00

At Alzheimer's Notes at b5media, Liz Lewis from New Zealand has joined me as a co-author. She's an RN and works with the over 65 age group, thus has experience with dementia and Alzheimer's disease. Liz will be adding an international, as well as professional dimension to the blog, since I live in the US and have been involved with Alzheimer's as a caregiver for my mom and aunt, author, and speaker.

You may like to visit Alzheimer's Notes to learn about the information we're posting.

Christmas Alzheimer's Story at Alzheimer's Notes.com

2006-12-16T08:12:00.000-08:00

I've posted a story about Christmas and Alzheimer's at Alzheimer's Notes.com that I wrote, several years ago, for an Australian church publication. It's loosely based upon my experiences caring for my mom.

Perhaps in reading this story, you'll feel less guilt or sadness if you can't bring your family member home for the holidays.

Caregiver's Poll on Alzheimer's Notes

2006-12-03T20:55:00.000-08:00

I've included a poll on my b5media Alzheimer's Notes blog concerning caregivers. It helps me know what information and resources to include if I have some idea who my readers are.

I hope, through both of these blogs, I can give encouragement and inspiration for caregivers as they go through this difficult time in their lives and that of the person they're caring for.

You'll also find a great deal of other information at this blog. Let me know what you'd like to find here, too.

What is an Alzheimer's Blogathon?

2006-07-31T16:40:00.000-07:00

Over at b5media.com's Alzheimer's Notes (www.alzheimersnotes.com) I wrote about Cathy's participation in a blogathon to benefit the Alzheimer's Association, on July 29. Cathy of Cathy's Rants and Ramblin's, blogged for 24 hours to meet her fund raising goal.

To learn more about Cathy's experience and to read some of her blogs, visit her site, http://arthritisrants.blogspot.com ).

Driving & the Alzheimer's Patient

2006-07-01T18:25:00.000-07:00

Allowing your family member with AD to continue driving often becomes a difficult decision for caregivers and families.

For more information about this topic, visit my blog, To Drive or Not to Drive, at www.alzheimersnotes.com

Alzheimer's & Memory Albums

2006-06-29T09:12:00.000-07:00

If you'd like to read about making Memory Books/Albums for and with Alzheimer's patients, visit my Alzheimer's Notes site at www.alzheimersnotes.com. I wrote about my experience making scrapbooks with residents at the nursing home where my mom once lived.

I also linked to Carol Moxley's story about her dad and Memory Albums.

My mom and aunt were afflicted with Alzheimer's disease. I've also made an album about my mom's Alzheimer's years and mention it in an earlier article on Alzheimer's Notes.

Some people might find it sad to do this. Our family looks at those pictures and remembers the joy we brought my mom during this time in her life. It is amazing that in just about every picture she'd smiling.

Protecting the Alzheimer's Patient from the Sun

2006-06-10T20:02:00.000-07:00

To learn more about protecting your family member from the sun when they may not realize the dangers because of Alzheimer's, visit my web site at www.alzheimersnotes.com . There I've posted information on this topic, as well as some research regarding clothing that offers more protection than others.

Because someone with Alzheimer's, if they knew about the danger of UV rays, may have forgotten, we need to be aware for them.

More Alzheimer's Information

2006-06-03T17:19:00.000-07:00

For those reading this blog who desire more information about Alzheimer's, visit my column at www.alzheimersnotes.com.

Here I have additional stories and resources you may find of interest and help.

What Is Quality of Life?

2006-02-24T17:37:00.000-08:00

“What is quality of life?” becomes a question many families of Alzheimer’s patients eventually ask themselves. To each person it’s different and even will vary as one becomes involved as caregiver for a family member. You also may be surprised with what you discover.

Before my mother developed Alzheimer’s, I never thought I’d want her to continue living at a stage where she didn’t know me, where she was dependent on others for her care, where she often lived in the world of her childhood. However, my view on this changed as I saw both Mother and her sister take the journey through their Alzheimer’s worlds.

I realized that even though Mother became less capable, often did frustrating things, might think I was someone else, she was still my mother. She still was interested, for shorter and shorter periods, in life around her and my activities.

As a former school teacher, she sat fascinated throughout the afternoon as I prepared a slide program about the Oregon Trail to present to youngsters. When I arrived home, she wanted a report on how it had gone, even though her thoughts drifted off soon after she inquired. I still have fond memories of that shared time together.

We’d bring out the quilt I made with her mother (my grandmother) when I was eight-years old. Mother recognized some of the pieces as fabric in a younger life. The reminisces of earlier days became treasured information I wrote down to share with future generations.

We looked out the patio door one evening and saw our reflections. Mother’s thinking these were visitors stretched my imagination. We learned that finding humor in situations we couldn’t control brought laughter into our lives and lessened the frustrations.

Later when Mother resided in a nursing home and seldom recognized me, my daughter, or my grandchildren, she still enjoyed the youngsters’ visits. “Such good children,” Mother remarked as they played around her wheelchair. Then she patted the little boy on his head. He looked up and grinned at his great grandmother.

Mother lived many years beyond what many people would consider a “life of value.” However, for my family and me, she added a dimension to our lives…one of caring, understanding, and laughter we would have missed if we’d thought her of no significance and discontinued caring for her and visiting her.

For those who think an Alzheimer’s patient has no quality of life, they haven’t experienced the joy of seeing someone’s face light up from a shared hug, kind word, or laughter even though they might not fully understand the situation or who you are. “Quality of life” takes on a new meaning when you consider it from this viewpoint.

©2003 Mary Emma Allen

(Mary Emma Allen lives in a multi-generational home in New Hampshire and writes about Alzheimer’s, including her book, “When We Become the Parent to Our Parents.”
She also gives talks at nursing homes and for caregiver groups. Visit her web site at: http://homepage.fcgnetworks.net/jetent/mea; E-mail: me.allen@juno.com )

A Privilege to Care

2006-02-17T17:29:00.000-08:00

So few people understand how I could find joy in caring for my mom and aunt with Alzheimer's...and to continue writing and speaking about this experience to encourage others. So many people I've talked with, as I've spoken to groups around the country, feel caring for a family member was a traumatic experience and one they’d like forget.

I would rather my mom and Auntie hadn't endured Alzheimer's. However, it wasn't for us to decide. Once I realized they had this disease, my aunt first and then my mom, as she was caring for Auntie, I certainly couldn't turn my back on them.

They developed Alzheimer's in an era when this disease wasn't talked about very much. Families almost wanted to deny their loved one had it. Support groups and networks for caregivers were very few. However, my neighbor, who was responsible for her great aunt with Alzheimer's, and I helped boost one another. We shared experiences, laughed and cried, and found new ways to appreciate these ladies.

Now that Mother and Auntie are gone, I realize I was given an opportunity to make two ladies happier, midst our frustrations and discouragements. I was given an opportunity to learn about caring when roles are reversed, when we come upon the unexpected in life, when we rather the situation were different.

As I look back, I understand that I was given a privilege to care for Mother and Auntie and learned about love in a different phase.

(c)2005

(If you have questions or information to share, e-mail me: me.allen@juno.com; type "Alzheimer's Blog" in the subject line.)

Sharing With Caregivers

2006-02-01T06:54:00.000-08:00

When I mentioned I’d cared for my mom and aunt, who developed Alzheimer’s, the young woman I met while waiting at the airport immediately remarked, “We need to talk.”

It turned out she thought her Father might be developing Alzheimer’s and simply needed to talk with someone who had been through this situation of seeing a parent overcome with this disease and trying to help them.

So many people simply need someone to talk to, find a shoulder to lean on, a person to reassure them they can cope as they help their family member. That’s why I began writing newspaper and magazine articles on this topic, which evolved into my book, When We Become the Parent to Our Parents, and contributions to other books.

I also give talks to caregiver groups and in nursing homes to connect with caregivers, whether they’re family members or doing this as their profession.

“Alzheimer’s is a devastating disease,” I often say. “But it doesn’t have to devastate your or your family member.”

(c)2006

(If you have questions or want to share, e-mail me: me.allen@juno.com. Type "Alzheimer's Blog" in the subject line.)

Joy in Alzheimer's in Second Printing

2006-01-24T18:43:00.000-08:00

It’s exciting to find your work included in a popular anthology, especially when it’s a book that’s helping others. I have several essays concerning my mother’s journey through Alzheimer’s in Finding the Joy in Alzheimer’s, Caregivers Share the Joyful Times, by Brenda Avadian.

Imagine my pleasure in learning from Brenda that the book is going into its second printing.

Brenda and I have cared for parents who’ve experienced this illness. Even though it’s a demanding experience, emotionally and physically, you can find rewards in knowing you’re making this loved one’s Alzheimer’s years as pleasant as possible.

My daughter and grandchildren learned from my mom, too. Even when she didn’t know us, we could enjoy activities with this lady in our lives.

Many caregivers have contributed to Finding the Joy in Alzheimer’s. Hopefully this book will aid you if you’re a caregiver for someone with Alzheimer’s.

Brenda also has published Finding the Joy in Alzheimer’s, Book 2.

When We Become the Parent to Our Parents

2006-01-18T20:02:00.000-08:00

At first I wrote about Mother's and Auntie's experiences for newspapers and magazines. Soon so many caregivers seemed to be reaching out for comfort, that I began making copies of my articles to share.

Finally a friend said, "Mary, why don't you compile the articles into a book? You can reach so many more people that way."

So the idea for When We Become the Parent to Our Parents evolved and my book, which I also illustrated, resulted. Here I try to give insight into caregiving and to bring comfort and understanding to caregivers.

I've always said, "Alzheimer's is a devastating disease. But it doesn't have to devestate you nor your family member who has it."

I dedicated the book to my mom and aunt, two ladies who were always concerned about other people. Through my writing, they leave a legacy of caring and helping others through this journey in their lives.

(c)2006

(For more information about When We Become the Parent to Our Parents, e-mail me: me.allen@juno.com. Type "Alzheimer's blog" in the subject line.)

Why Write About Alzheimer's?

2006-01-18T17:55:00.000-08:00

"That's such a horrible disease," people often remark. "Why do you want to write about your experiences caring for your mom and aunt?"

I learned there could be joy in caring for these ladies...joy in seeing them smile and experience contentment in a world so different from the one we imagined they'd be living while in their eighties. I found joy watching the interaction between my grandchildren and their great grandmother. This created pleasurable memories that will remain with the children throughout their lives.

I learned that life isn't always as we imagined nor planned. However, there often is a purpose in the experiences we face.

By sharing with others the experiences my mom, my aunt, and my family faced, perhaps we can help them in their journey through Alzheimer's.

(c)2006